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People sometimes talk about the line between spontaneity and quality.
I honestly don't know where that line is.
Maybe the more useful question is whether you're acting stupidly based on the resources you actually have.
If you have 10 kroner for dinner, the relevant question is probably whether you're eating penne or spaghetti. Not whether oysters would technically be a better meal.
If pasta isn't good enough, I guess you can go to bed hungry.
Working quickly obviously has its limits. If the time between an idea and the event is short, fewer people will hear about it. Fewer people will experience it before it disappears again. Bigger applications and funding processes also become harder to fit into that rhythm.
But there is another side to waiting.
If you spend a year at the bus stop waiting for the perfect bus, ten perfectly good ones have probably driven past.
And you still missed dinner.
Eleven years later, I still believe there is value in acting while an idea is alive. Sometimes you get a punch in the stomach. Sometimes you somehow end up eating oysters galore with a good bottle of white wine, despite starting with 10 kroner in your pocket.
You rarely know which one it will be beforehand.
CURIOSITY BEFORE CERTAINTY
I can't really explain where that urge comes from.
Maybe I just have a screw loose.
Maybe I should have started taking pills much earlier, and the world would have looked very different, both to me and to everyone standing around watching.
Or maybe it is simply curiosity.
A curiosity that I stubbornly refuse to grow out of, whether I'm 20 or 200 years old.
Fine. I probably won't make it to 200.
Probably.
A little Kunst i Kaffen never hurt anyone.
But eleven years of making things has changed something. Experience has made me more cautious in some ways. Less impulsive. You learn that collaboration has a cost. You meet a lot of people. Some stay, some leave, some become partners, some become friends, and others become a story you tell yourself about why you'll probably do things differently next time.
It can make you tired.
It can also make you better at lifting things together with the people around you.
I'm still not afraid of doing things, but when I look inward, I can see a person who is a little more held back than he used to be. I don't necessarily think that's a bad thing.
The impulse is still there.
I still believe in people in an almost naïve way.
I still believe people want to create, take part, help each other and start things.
If I stopped believing that, there wouldn't be much point in continuing.
_to be continued!
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